Wednesday, 26 March 2008

X-core panic..


I'm not sleeping. Well, not without intense nightmares/sex nightmares. And the medication I take for my lovely friend, my panic disorder, isn't working anymore.

The circumstances of life pave the way, almost entirely, as to what I will listen to at any given moment. Whether it be breaking sub-woofers in an attempt to create the most all-out, rollicking rave while I drunkenly bounce off walls and bruise every inch of my soft body, or whether I'm curled up, face tucked deeply into a pretty cushion with huge, warm, enveloping headphones singing sweet, gentle melodies into my consciousness. So this blog reflects that, increasingly. It is not something I can help, nor will apologise for. Not always at the cutting edge of the latest releases, because, for me, that is not very frequently how music works and, in my humble opinion, is not how music should be listened to. We've kind of got muddled in this world of immediacy where an album or track is forgotten of as quickly as it is conceived.

Right now my life makes Hollyoaks look boring and banal. (Incest and psychotic murder is never boring)

So, if I'm honest with you, I'm trying hard to put on a very well practised facade. Thus, it is probably no surprise I've found myself listening to very garbled and noisy music. Reflects the inside of my head better.

I love Four Tet.

Four Tet - Smile Around The Face [via YouSendIt for 7 days]

4 comments:

Wallace said...

loving the four tet. the rest of this post makes me sad :( if you need some loving, come to york! i'll be there from monday. sex nightmares?? blimey!!tomx

a very public sociologist said...

Sex nightmares? One part of me wants to know what shape they assume. But another tells me my stomach might not be strong enough.

Hope you get better soon.

miles away said...

i really hope (as this was a little time ago) that time has passed, and things are a little better.

also, i definitely agree that four tet are wonderful. gloriously so.

Mulrine said...

Awww. Thank you.

Yes, things are still stressful but I've got something to smile about at the moment. Hopefully will stay that way.